The DownSide of the Upside
November 19, 2009
I’ve experienced another level of reality this week, dealing with unemployment compensation and health insurance, meeting with my financial planner and gathering information about social security.
It’s been a steep learning curve and I wish I’d spent more time looking at the financial piece of the Wheel of Opportunity. But I mustn’t let the feelings of guilt spiral me into a depression. “It is what it is” has become a way of life for so many who suffer the real or impending possible loss of our homes and our livelihoods. That’s one aspect of the nature of change – the feeling of being out of control and the necessity of putting it into the context of a transtion. Change signifies what has happened, transition speaks to the possibility of what comes next.
There are 3 stages to a transition and each has its associated feeling states which have been well researched by William Bridges, author of Transitions, Making Sense of Life’s Changes.
The Ending phase reflects feelings of shock, anger and disbelief and often relief. The Neutral Zone is wrought with uncertainy, anxiety depression and glimmers of light. New Beginning are marked by creativity and seeing new possibiliities.
I need to honor where I am in the transition process and the associated feelings. Dealing with money, limitations, a steep learning curve and not having a great personal track record in the area of financial literacy means high stress for me. And yet, deal with it I must. But then after I’ve gathered the information and made some decisions it’s time to move on. Get creative, go with the flow. Honor my feelings and make the most of each day.
The feelings associated with the loss are not easy ones to express. Anger can leak out and have negative effects on our relationships. Feeling loss means mourning the relationships I had which get severed for the most part when we leave an organization.
The downside of gaining my freedom and the excitement of recreating my life and livelihood means experiencing the intensity of the roller coaster ride.
I hope you’ll hang in (or check in periodically) on the ride.
Have you lost a job and do you have a story you’d like to share.
New Beginnings
November 11, 2009
My position was terminated on Monday, November 9, 2009, after about six years working for the same non-profit where I finally landed after reloacting to Tucson Arizona 8 years ago. I know I’m one of the lucky ones, because I already had my Portfolio of Opportunity prepared. In fact if any you are still working (and it seems there are fewer and fewer these days) you’ll definitely want to be working on your Plan B.
So what’s a Portfolio of Opportunity? It’s a planning and visioning process for setting intentions in all areas of your life so you will be as prepared for the next phase of any transition as soon as possible. Some of us used to call this transition at my age “retirement”, but that’s a thing of the past. But having my portfolio prepared, means that I left work on Monday and didn’t have to agonize of WHAT DO I DO NEXT?
This holistic approach includes goal setting in the following areas:
In the Employment area – my business is ready to go, lots of pieces are in place and I’ll add more now that I have the time.
In the Health and Wellness area – my regularly scheduled walk no longer has to take place in the dark at 6:30 AM – so I’d have time to get to work. Now I can walk at 8 AM when the light is full and the temp a bit warmer. Incidentally, in just the past few months while I had health insurance partially covered I managed to get to the dentist and the eye doctor. Hurray – (on some level we know don’t we these transitions are coming.
In the Financial area, I’ve made a meeting with my financial planner, will sign up for unemployment tomorrow and do the best with what I’ve got (just like everyone else.)
In the area of Housing, Transportation & Safety – I had an appointment scheduled to have some major work done on my car… and I went ahead and did it to the tune of $1500.00 (minimal) But, I can’t drive in a car I don’t trust.
In the area of Having Fun, Socializing and Volunteering I selected the organization yesterday where I will volunteer my skills as a career counselor and am grateful they were there for me when I needed them.
The final area in the Wheel of Opportunity – is fortunately one I don’t neeed to pay attention to, and that is Caregiving. For the moment, my friends, family and loved ones are healthy and thriving and nothing is required of me. But I know how easy it is for that piece of the wheel to create havoc. I’m grateful all is well.
So in the first week of being “unemployed” my position having been “terminated” I am looking forward to picking up the pieces of this business – and sharing with you WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?
I hope you’ll join me on the journey and soon we’ll be publishing the full extent of the Reframing Your Future program and the Wheel of Opportunity. Stay posted.
